Good News? How Unfamiliar..

I met with Dr. S. in Denver today, and I finally feel like I've gotten some better news. It's nice to get another perspective too, and I have to say, I'm really glad my second opinion came from a woman.

Dr. S. is a tiny little surgeon who is very confident, informative, and smart. She was so nice, but mostly she wowed me with her intelligence. She told me that her office was mostly devoted to breast surgeries, and that 8% of all breast cancer cases in Colorado go through her practice. That's pretty impressive to me.

Both Dr. D. and Dr. S. were quick to notice my age, and even though it might sound silly, they were both perfectly sensitive to what it means for a 25-year-old single woman to face breast cancer. Somehow it just seems easier if you're already married and don't really have to worry about being perfect and attractive for dating. I know that sounds silly; it makes me even roll my eyes at myself for worrying about my aesthetics when my life is sorta at stake, but I am terrified to come out of this all ugly. How vain. But seriously.

Anyway, Dr. S. did a cool thing, which was that she talked to me before looking at my test results and films. She said she liked to do that so she could get a feeling for what a patient is hoping for, and what kind of lifestyle and general situation she's in. That ways she doesn't have a preconception for what should happen and what can be possible. I let her know that the prospect of a bilateral mastectomy at my age is... horrifying. Terrifying. Not ideal, in any case. She warmly told me that I definitely have options, which was good to hear, but as she had not seen my films, I didn't want to get my hopes up. She also disagreed when I told her the first surgeon seemed convinced that my cancer is genetic. She said it wasn't necessarily genetic.

So after talking to us about what I was hoping for and my general situation, she went to look at my films. My parents left and I undressed. All these appointments seem to have breast exams... she was like the fifth stranger that week to have her hands on my breasts... She did a quick exam and then I redressed. My parents came back and we got ready for the big pow-wow.

First she gave us a rundown on breast cancer, which we sorta already knew but she gave a more detailed explanation and drew pictures. And she drew them upside-down so we could see them right-side-up!

Dr. S. had new information from my pathology that Dr. D. didn't have on Friday. This may or may not have affected why their opinions ended up being so different. Anyway, she told me that my tumors are ER/PR negative, meaning they are not stimulated by hormones. This is both good and bad news. It's bad news because it means I do not have the option of hormonal treatments, narrowing my scope of treatments. It's good because ER/PR negative tumors respond really well to chemotherapy. She said "They just melt away, implode!" That's a great thing because it meant that if I were to do chemo first, which is a relatively new method but results in the same chances for survival, my tumor would shrink down considerably (such to the point that sometimes surgeons can't find them anymore save for the metal markers that are placed inside!) and a lumpectomy would still be possible. Hooray! Even if it's a long shot, it means there's still a chance, and a bilateral mastectomy isn't my only answer. Of course, my oncologist would have to agree that that's the best way to go, so it's not like I'm in the clear or anything. And she did bring up the genetic test, because if it is indeed a genetic cancer, then mastectomy might be the smartest and safest choice.

Dr. S. kept repeating that I do have choices here, which was comforting. She also said she has no ego, and if she functions only as a second opinion, that's fine with her. She spent ample time with us, and that was great.

I left this appointment feeling a new sense of hope, but trying not to get my hopes up too much because the bad news is just so crushing. But at least we knew more than before, and I really liked her method.

I guess we'll see what the oncologist says. I'm really looking forward to meeting her now because these two surgeons have given me two totally contrasting opinions, and I have no clue what's going on again.